Dance like nobody's watching

Foolish dancer

[♣] Non stop Singing
[♣] Dance Enthusiast
[♣] Stage Addict
[♣] Emotional
[♣] Loves to let her creative juices run feely through designing
[♣] love and be loveD
[♣] get together & be close with my familY


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Credits

Designer: Elies
Base code:OHsaygoodbye
Image: Kristi

Friday, February 09, 2007

( i'm thinking again.... @ 2:06 PM )

my brother will be getting back his Os level results today.. Good Luck Yong~

i remember the day when i was getting back my Os results... it was a great feeling to go back to school, seeing all the classmates and also the anxiety to get my results. To see how i've fare for my Os and whether my hard work paid off. When I gt back the results, I was very happy and touched. Happy cus I din fail any of the subjects and touched was because I actually scored a B3 for my E. Maths. FYI, I've always been lousy with numbers. All the tests or exams that I took were either E8 or D7. I was always scanning thru those test papers that I got back, hoping that my teacher miscalculated the points and that I actually got that 1 or 2 more marks to pass the paper, but of course, I was never lucky.

i got to thank Sutee and Mrs. Pong cus these are 2 great teachers who really helped me alot and made sure that I know all the functions and solutions to the questions. I did those 10yrs series over and over again and I recalled asking myself if I will ever apply those x + y or a = b + c formulaes in my future work life. Well, till date, I haven't got the chance to use them. wth.

however, thou i was happy for my results, i was also full of regrets toward my sister. she din passed her maths and the only choice open for her was ITEs. I din caused her to fail her maths but i indirectly caused her to miss the Chinese Os Listening. I woked up for the exam that day and thou I saw her still sleeping in the bed, I didn't woke her up, thinking that she will wake up by herself. However, she had actually overslept and I was too stupig to realised that. Maybe she would have strive harder for the other papers if I had woke her up for tt listening paper. maybe we should have studied together for our Maths during those days. And perhaps maybe, she would have also graduated from some poly and pursuing a career of her interest now... maybe maybe...

i tried to ask her to re-take the maths paper. guess i was tryin to atone for my mistake so tt i will feel less guilty. but she has already lost all motivation in studies and during those days when she was hanging out with a grp of 'pavillion' frds, my persuasions just fell on deaf ears.

it's been 6yrs since we took back the Os results. I've graduated from a poly and is now workin in a international company. Still considered not too bad. My sis has left pavillion and worked in a logistic company for more than 2 years. Wel, at least it's a proper job. But at times, I do feel myself trying to find ways to help her. I guess i'm still feeling guilty...

V day is coming. i managed to straighten out some thoughts this morning. suddenly feel so released of all troubles. love shouldn't be so demanding and tiring. learning to let go can be alot more happier than holding on.

In a relationship when one party starts to give you too much pressure by always giving in to you. Will you carry on with the burden or will you change yourself?

I chose the latter.

~i'm willing to change cus i love you~



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